Once upon a time I was a huge Sex in the City fan. One big break up on the show stood out from the rest. Samantha sold Smith, "I love you, but I love me more."
In my work LOTS of people tell me they're unhappy in relationships and want to leave but without something obviously "wrong" with the relationship they're afraid to leave. Stuck in a terrible less-than-happy confusion-filled limbo.
Or they're clearly unhappy but afraid to hurt their partner.
"What if you love yourself more?" I ask.
"What if your happiness is enough?"
Not everyone leaves like Samantha did, but prioritizing our own needs, loving ourselves more, and valuing our own happiness shifts us from stuck to clear.
If you love yourself more you'll start a conversation, or say enough is enough, or go to couples therapy, or say no, or pack your things.